Managing shame is sometimes a lot more difficult than guilt. It requires rebuilding your self esteem and faith in yourself. This takes lifestyle change and that takes time. To manage shame, name what you did or what you’re still doing to cause you to feel ashamed. First stop whatever you are doing that causes you to feel ashamed. Accept that it will take time to work through the feelings you have about yourself.
Find a counselor or a trusted friend to talk to. Shame can be isolating. When you begin communicating with others, be cautious about who you talk to. Not everyone should be trusted to hear your story. Talk only to people who will not make you feel more ashamed (Potter-Efron, R., & Potter-Efron, P., 1989). A mental health professional may be the first option to try. Return to the “Guilt and Shame Stress Inventory Worksheet” at the end of the chapter and list any techniques or strategies you would like to use to manage each shame stressor identified on page two of the form.